rabbi, three quick shabbos and havdalah questions.
1. shabbos candles: is the mitzva only for women? if a man lives alone, is he obligated to light, and does he make the bracha? and if a man lights, single, widower, or his wife is away, does he light two candles like the usual custom? is the preference that a woman lights a real halachic preference, or just how the custom developed?
2. havdalah without a candle: if a person has wine but no candle motzei shabbos, traveling or somewhere fire is not allowed, is the bracha on the fire me’akev? does an electric light or a flashlight count for borei meorei ha’eish? and if no fire is available at all, can havdalah wait, and until when?
3. havdalah before melacha: the shulchan aruch (orach chayim 299:10) forbids any work before havdalah, and says saying “hamavdil” without a bracha is enough to permit work. but shabbos already ended at tzeis by the clock, so what is havdalah adding? does it end shabbos or only permit melacha? and does ata chonantanu in maariv count for this?
bottom line, basically: where does the common practice end and the actual halacha begin?
Thank you Rabbi, thank you very much.
Shabbat candles are not a mitzvah only for women. The household needs Shabbat lights. Women traditionally have precedence in performing the mitzvah, and Chazal gave women a particular connection to it, but if a man lives alone, is widowed, or his wife is away and nobody else is lighting for him, he lights and makes the bracha.
The basic mitzvah can be fulfilled with one light. The widespread custom is two, corresponding to זכור ושמור, and that custom has nothing to do with whether the person lighting is married. So a man lighting for himself can light the usual two. Electric Shabbat lights can also be used according to the way I understand the mitzvah. The purpose is having the Shabbat light.
For Havdalah, neither the candle nor the besamim is me’akev. If you have wine but no fire, do not postpone Havdalah looking for a candle. Make Havdalah and move on. The Shulchan Aruch specifically says that if you do not have a flame, you do not have to go searching for one.
An electric light or flashlight is not בורא מאורי האש. That bracha requires actual fire.
As to the flame itself, one flame is technically enough. But the Kol Bo explains that an אבוקה, a torch made from multiple flames or wicks together, is מצוה מן המובחר. His reason is very simple: the nusach of the bracha is בורא מאורי האש, “Who creates the lights of the fire,” in the plural, and an avukah visibly contains multiple lights.
So if you have a box of wooden matches, why take out one when you can just as easily take out two and hold them together? The same with ordinary candles: if you can easily use two wicks together so that they form an avukah, that is preferable. One flame is valid, but in today’s circumstances there is usually no reason not to do the mitzvah מן המובחר.
If someone missed Havdalah completely on Motzei Shabbat, the Havdalah over the cup can still be made afterward through Tuesday. The brachot on fire and besamim, however, belong specifically to Motzei Shabbat and are not made later.
Finally, Havdalah does not make Shabbat end. Shabbat ends at the proper time whether or not you have made Havdalah. Chazal nevertheless required a verbal separation before beginning melachah.
If you said אתה חוננתנו in Maariv, that counts and you may do melachah. If you did not daven Maariv yet, or forgot Ata Chonantanu, simply say ברוך המבדיל בין קודש לחול, without a bracha formula, and you may do melachah. You still need the regular Havdalah over the cup before eating or drinking.
So the short version is: a man can light Shabbat candles with a bracha; two candles are the custom, not the minimum requirement. Havdalah does not require fire or besamim. Actual fire is required for בורא מאורי האש, and although one flame is valid, two flames together are preferable as an אבוקה and are ordinarily very easy to arrange. Shabbat itself ends at nightfall; Havdalah is the required verbal transition afterward, not what causes Shabbat to end.
Shalom,
In regards of Shabbat’s night Kiddush. It is permissible to drink plain water before night Kiddush?
In Rambam’s MT Shabbat 30 it seems to me that water is not really a problem.
Yes