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Author:  Gabriel
E-mail:  not available
Date:  12/16/2005 10:03:00 PM
Subject:  School crush
Message:  Hi, I go to a private yeshiva (Jewish High School) and I have a crush on a girl from a very frum background and is shomer

I really like this girl and was wondering how to approach her or if I should at all, while being as respectful as possible. For the record, my family is not very religious and she and her family are, although I have taken it upon myself to try to be more observant when possible.
Reply:  NO, you should not approach or talk to her. First of all, it would be a issur of 'lifnei iver lo titein michshol' 'in front of a blind person you should not put a stumbling block'. She may slip up and talk. Secondly, relationships that begin this way, are destined for disaster, because there is no bracha in such a relationship. It was not done according to Halacha.
Just as an added comment, if someone is frum, then they must be 'shomer'. We can't pick and choose which Halachos we will keep and which we will be lenient on. Especially not as a policy.
We have reached a strange situation where part of an introduction is 'are you shomer or not'. Why not 'do you daven 3 times a day'. AND what about the people who say I only want to go out with a girl who is not shomer. We know what that means, HASHEM YIRACHEM. (I guess their food is not bishul akum, but are they 'frum' as we know the word?)

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